Mostly medical

Conversations had, or heard in the past week.

Holding on
A: so we've been learning about constipation in kids. It becomes this cycle of them holding on and not going (etc). I had a thought in the shower, you know the song "Keep Holding On"?
B: yeah? *hums*
A: keep holding on... just stay strong... there's nothing you can say, there's nothing you can do... *giggle giggle*

Self introduction
A: hi, my name is Dr A
B: hi I'm his mum, and just to clarify, I'm also the referring GP involved with this case
Students (muttering to each other): gee that's weird

Sewing techniques
A: I need to sew the button back, you know how to sew right?
B: maybe, we learnt during high school
A: I guess you can do surgical sutures, it shouldn't be too hard
B: true, so next time when I'm fixing a hole in my pants I'm going to use the simple interrupted suture
A: what, that's ridiculous! Can you imagine what that would look like when you walk out onto the street?

Crack

When I heard that sound, I raised my eyebrows, and boiled inside. I didn't come here to be reminded, I didn't miss this at all, and I have no interest in dealing with it again.

(By the way, it wasn't a crack sound.)

It all came back. The incredible hate. No matter how much patching happens, this pulls out each thread, undoing any progress. Like my fake grandma described, it's never the same after the crack. It never quite fits again.

But I suppose I shouldn't for several reasons.

Reason one: incredibly annoying and troublesome as this is, the core issue lies elsewhere.

Reason two: I want to be able to have fellowship with God.

Reason three: if you can, there's no reason that I shouldn't too. I'm touched by your forgiveness, however incomplete and tainted. And meeting that time, I was surprised once again by your gracious manner, especially knowing just how deep the murderous venom ran within you.

Precious times

Each year, the family holiday is supposed to be an investment, to gather the four of us together, to the same place, to common activities, in a situation where we're less likely to (but we still do) argue, and deepen our family ties. Thanks mum and dad, it's a wise investment.

Many holidays, we head to the town of my birth. The smog ridden city, where non smokers can have COPD from just breathing the city air, a city with food and shopping as expensive as M, but cheaper taxis, prettier neon lights, colder winters. I don't fancy the place, but that is where family is, and that's where I want to be. Because even the most beautiful seaside scenery, the most amazing mist covered mountain, the most interesting old stone buildings, the most delicious meal - well, it starts to become indistinguishable in my mind.

Not too many years back, I was often frustrated with not being able to see what I wanted to see, do what I wanted to do, because of the annoying little sister who the holiday schedule revolved around, and the control freak dad who always had to be the one to decide what we ate for each meal.

But more and more, just being with family is so much more important than eating good food, travelling, exploring (although I enjoy each of these things). Anything goes now, I'm content to travel with parents to wherever they want to go, not at all bored to be home with elderly grandparents for days and weeks, and happy to accompany my sister to play children's games, go to places where kids like to go to. Do we all need years of distance to realise that time together is precious?

Highlights!

1. Sitting with my grandparents after dinner in the lounge, munching on 瓜子 and half watching TV. Asking about thei travels, listening to stories of other family members, of how their most unusual marriage with an age difference of more than twenty years came about, about quirky old neighbours. Then having an early night every night because living with elderly people, you can't help but adopt their habits.

2. Teasing my cousins about girls. Chatting with my younger cousin til late, talking about school, relationships, family, about God. Listening to a sincere prayer, without frills, without the conventions and "standard" language we all invariably adopt after years of learning, is refreshing. And kid, for someone who's never lived overseas, your English is amazing.

3. Being silly with C. Brains. The zombies are coming, noooooo! It's not a peashooter, it's pea-ple! Teaching her 听不懂 because every adult invariably stops and asks, 听得懂吗？Laughing at her half joking and half puzzled expression as she points to a lovely little girl with perfectly dark and straight hair, commenting "why is her hair so neat, and mine so messy?" Hand claps, tic tac toe give me a high give me a low. Thumb war. Sumo wrestling. Cheater cheater pumpkin eater. I'm a rat I'm a rat I'm a furry furry rat with a looooong tail and looooong whiskers, and teeny greedy eyes, and two big yellow teeth, and I like to eat cheese and rotten eggs. Giggle giggle. Practice makes perfect! You have the funniest facial expressions, you're caring enough to be my older sister, you're affectionate to everyone and you're the most adorable little sister (I'm not little, I'm a middle sized kid) in the world.