Writing about writing

"I don't understand, how can anyone write so much?"

I love writing.
Making sense of life. Sorting, shaping thoughts, feelings, views.
Stopping them from crazily and endlessly spinning in my head.
But you have to be careful with what you share with the world.
Careful not to write about people you know, offending them.
Careful not to name people, not to say too much about yourself.
Careful, so you think you are safe but maybe you are not.
Even in a convoluted way, there is depth in sharing who you are.
Never thinking, how abstract words, could surprise you.
Colliding with a mirror of your inner world, painfully. In tangible reality.
Writing to touch others, never imagining how profoundly it would touch you.
Writing about what was learnt; not seeing the start of a new lesson.
How could questions and uncertainties be so intertwined with writing.
Not knowing what to think, say. Not wanting to say anything at all.
Food was scrumptious. Blissful. Cannot hurt, or turn insane.
For a time. But sickening after a terrible evening. Hate it.
For a time, wanting to never, ever, write about it again.
So here I am again, resuming drafts on what I really love to write about.

Going private

For the months to come I'm switching the blog settings to private.
Contact me with your email address for an invite.

Puzzles

Hello, fellow night owls.
We all love a good mystery.
Playing detectives is fun.

In my profession, and in your profession
Aren't we the experts in thinking about history,
Collecting signs, and sifting through differentials?

Own up and explain why you're prying.
Tell me, is it genuine, friendly interest
Or are you just being sneaky and intrusive?

(I mean seriously, what are you looking for? Psychiatry? - you're in the wrong field. God? The daily happenings? Thoughts and feelings? You want to see how the story unfolds? Are you trying to annoy me? Are you just waiting for a not-so-subtle message like the one that's right here?)

I am cracking the code.
You know who you are,
And I know where you are.

I am watching like a hawk.

On that last point

More on the last point. If you have a hunger for information, have an issue you need to sort out, find me in real life, give me a buzz, write to my inbox, instead of creeping like a coward under the shadows of anonymity.

Those tails

Of the three blind rats, three blind rats, see how they run, see how they run. I love nursery rhymes and fairy tales as much as my little sister does, maybe more. Welcome to my new blog, which is really a continuation of 19-tails.blogspot.com, and "Cheese and Whiskers" (rats-tails.blogspot.com).

Do you know I’ve been wanting to start a new blog for almost a year now? And the part which stops me every time is the setting up process, picking a domain name, picking a name for the blog, setting up the layout. I finally picked a name, and oh no, it's rat related again. Sorry. I was tossing up between rat references and something more along the lines of chasing after the wind (Ecclesiastes). Then there was the difficult question of - should I use Blogger, or Wordpress? After a little experimentation, and much frustration with Wordpress, I've come back to Blogger.

Blog writing has really evolved over the past few years for me, from a cautious experimentation to a method of regular reflections and sharing. My very first blog was a joint blog with a friend, in which I was much more excited about creating the website and coding, than I was about writing. Funny, now it’s the opposite – I love just being able to write and not worry about designing or formatting.

Four years has resulted in hundreds and hundreds of posts. Writing online has always been a delicate balance betweeen sharing, but not going into details about everyone, and everything in your life. Over the years you read back on your posts, some which you would love to keep, some which belong more to the diary than an online media.

Starting a new blog is about clearing a bit of space. I will always write my personal blog primarily for my own reflections, but over the years I have an increasing awareness of the “audience” (both the friends and the randoms) and of God. Over the years too, my focus has drifted away from relationship dramas and emo-ness (?depression). Ah don’t worry, I’m sure there will be occasional juicy posts about relationship issues and dabbles of deep dark thoughts to come.